name not yet decided

Started by Josh, June 03, 2009, 08:24:59 PM

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Josh

I was so bored i made this i know its a little short but i will add more stuff to it over time so what do you think about it what could be changed?


Three hundred years after the war between chex and flemiods is over the IFOC ambassador chexer the 5th decides to invade the flemiods but the flemiods are still repairing from the last war and are not prepared to fight another. You are a flemiod agent who is sent to chex city to destroy their greatest weapon they have created a zorcher so powerful it could zorch away the entire flemiod dimension.

Manny Cav

You seem to run everything in long sentences. I wouldn't do that. You also misspelled Flemoid and made a number of capitalization errors.

Three hundred years after the war between Chex and Flemoids is over, the IFOC ambassador Chexer [Chexter?] the 5th decides to invade the Flemoids, but the Flemoids are still repairing from the last war and are not prepared to fight another. You are a Flemoid agent who is sent to Chex City to destroy their greatest weapon. The Cereals have created a zorcher so powerful it could zorch away the entire Flemoid dimension.
R.I.P. The Game
January 3rd, 1937-
January 7th, 2010

Josh

>_> Mind me i am not really in my right mind today ty.

Replica

... It sounds like a mod to me.
I know what you're thinking. No, I don't like peanut butter.

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matthias720

:whale :caineware :ninjaware :whale :caineware :ninjaware

Josh

#5
Yeah it does i will improve it a little today.

(PS:I am not to good at storyline i am not so sure why i did this in the first place i think it was boredom.)